for some reason (y2k? rescession? grocery outlet? the Depression?) I a mother fucking stockpile shopper.

What? Organic soy milk on sale? I must by 25.

Whaaaa? Earths Best crunchin’ grahams on sale?! How many can I fit in my cart.

No Shit? 2lb logs of Goat Cheese (yes, I capitalized it. Its king in my house) for $4.99? I can freeze Goat Cheese, yes?

I literally could feed my little family for 6 months (including drinks, I have 15 bottles of wine) if worse comes to worse. Not to mention the 4 chickens and 90lb chocolate lab in my backyard that would be prime eatin.